3 Ways To Begin With A Great Attitude

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When a Director sits down with his theatrical production staff and they set out to begin the process of producing the next show to be done (usually the plays are chosen in advance, a season at a time, but the process is the same), the very first thing they look at is the attitude of the theatre-going public that is their audience.

The question to ask essentially is “What is it that they will desire to see?”

As in anything, it is a focused intensity to really know what your audience will pay to see. You see, when doing a community theatre production, you must put in a season of shows that have name recognition and are intriguing enough to get the casual play-goer a desire to see what it is you are offering. Yes, in a season, you may have one show that tends to be more edgy because the rest of the season can support it. But the season must be geared towards a complete experience that caters to your audience.

From there, they look to the general “attitude” of each individual show itself. Is it a musical, a drama, a comedy? What are the characters like and what kinds of attitude are they looking to from those who audition?

As a Director, you always have a concept of the part, not of who should be playing the part so much, as every actor brings a different attitude to the role, but the general overall attitude of the role. I have cast people who were not as good of singers in a musical, for example, but brought a tremendous chemistry, an overall attitude, to the role. This could make all the difference in the way a play is perceived.

It is is same as you begin to look at an opportunity or challenge that you face. As stated previously, it is the questions you ask at the beginning that help you frame the task ahead, such as is life.

The key here is the attitude you bring to the questions, as well as the answers, and it is crucial that you approach opportunities and challenges with a superb attitude.

Your Attitude Determines Your Altitude

There is an old maxim that goes, “Your Attitude determines your Altitude” and it goes without saying that if you don’t bring a great attitude into the challenge/opportunity, then there is not much chance that you will succeed at the task.

Why? Because if you are not fully invested with an incredible passion for the answers your questions pose, then why bother in the first place?

I am speaking from experience here. I’ve learned the hard way that by not being honest with yourself and by not living in this Now Moment by asking great questions and having an attitude that accompanies the answers that you know the universe will give you, then there is an expectation that will never be fulfilled.

Inevitably, there will be failure, which leads to a myriad of domino-like attitudes about yourself that doom most Now Moment living.

3 Ways to Adopt A Dynamic Attitude

Way 1: Find the parts of the challenge/opportunity that create a passion in you.

Yes, even with challenges there are elements within the challenge that do indeed inspire you. It may be nothing more than the person that is involved with you, but whatever that dynamic is, find that part and seize it. That is the aspect of any challenge or opportunity that will give you a laser-like focus until the end

Way 2: After aligning your passion point, now frame it as a pursuit.

Let me explain. I have developed within myself a disdain for the word….work. I no longer look towards work but, instead, look to the word, Pursuit. Reason being is that within the word pursuit is the definition, “the act of striving” and one dictionary has attached to it, zeal. So no longer are you working at something. Instead, have a “zeal” for it.

Find that part that drives you and pursue it

Way 3: After zoning in on your zeal, “audition” the people and other aspects needed to get you to opening night with style.

Remember, it is all about the attitude and not always is the most obvious choice the right one for you. Look at the attitude of whoever you bring on and will they bring that same attitude to the part you give them. Consequently, will you be able to derive a sense of attitude from other elements of the challenge/opportunity. Is that attitude suitable to you?

Again, the most obvious choice is not always the one that brings you a great attitude. It is all about creating an attitude of gratitude for the zeal of the challenge/opportunity at hand.

Create a great attitude and the results will be manifest from the universal realm. It is a universal law.

Let me know your thoughts and share with your friends. The greater the conversation, the better we move forward in this Now Moment.

Be a Person of Quality. Direct Your Power.

Until then…

Be Excellent, Expect the Best!

Let me Know your Thoughts Below, Follow this Blog, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

dasouthern@directyourpower.comDA Southern is an Author, Speaker, Blogger and a Personal Development Life Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for Coaching or Speaking @ dasouthern@directyourpower.com

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3 Ways to Stop Being Affected by Other’s Words of Worry Towards You

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Worry kills the spirit of the one it inhabits and infects those around them at the same time.

Why does this happen that a soul on a beautiful journey of love allows such an egoic, unhealthy and, very often, irrational look a future that does not yet exist into their very existence. Why has worry been given such a place of respect in our world. Worry is even joked about as a redeeming trait in many movies.

But there is the insidiousness of it, is it not? The idea that it is indeed fodder for ridicule and yet we allow it to still infect our lives baffles me. It as if we are saying it is not so good for someone else to worry, but, its OK for me because somehow, i have in under control.

But with this worry-bound life comes the eradication of Now Moments. Of course, that is the point of worry. In the wake of worry there are no Now Moments, only moments that are somehow out there that must be going to happen in some way and somehow the worry will make those future Now Moments easier to live.

Pretty bizarre thinking when you really analyze it.

The Worry of Others Infects Your Journey

I could go on for days here and have written posts about it before, but the most troubling aspect of worry is the way we allow others to impact our journey with their worrisome attitude. Really, when someone else worries about you in some situation and projects that worry on you, it is nothing but their ego rising to control you.

Let me give you an example of a client who recently took a tumble off of a ladder and broke his back. Now this man has an excellent attitude and takes a very youthful approach to age in general. Well, after he recuperated, he came and saw me and was having some issues with the thoughts of others that he was allowing to impact him.

Essentially, others were telling him that he should not go up on the ladder again. I asked him if he desired to, if he enjoyed getting up on the ladder doing things. He said that he did, that it was not a chore. So we established that it was not something he dreaded but that he felt able and loved being active.

I then asked if others were responsible for his happiness; could they determine the course of his life journey with their worry now moments any way.

He again said no.

I then told him that others were projecting their fear on to him because, more than likely, that is how they would have handled their fear. I even spoke to their wanting to control him by telling him that he was not able to overcome an accident that would more than likely never happen again..

After we finished, he looked back at me as he left and said, “Thank you. I am so tired of others deciding for me my joy in any moment.” I told him that it was none of his business what others thought of his actions and, quite frankly, if he wanted to skydive, it was his business.

3 Ways to Stop Being Affected by Others Words

You see, we have a way of inserting ourselves into the lives of others, often time in the very name of love as “concern” (worry) for them. But really what is going on, is our ego is impacted by them and we are always, if ego-driven, looking to protect ourselves by maintaining that relationship.

Way 1: Always Look at the Concern of Others in its True Nature

I am not asking you to be cold hearted here, but you must begin the journey of living for yourself.

If you are constantly allowing the words and concerns wrapped in worry from others to affect you, can you ever have a truthful journey on your own?

In a way, it is like when we lose a loved one. We mourn, but it is always about the way we are affected. If it is someone very close, we are affected as to the time that we no longer will spend with that person in our lives. Not that it is good or bad, it just it is what it is.

But if we grieve past the normal stages of grief that have been studied from author, Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, when she discusses the Five Stages of Grief, then we must look at the hold the ego has on the very act of living.

Way 2: Don’t Allow Others Words of Worry to Become Your Existence

If you base your life on what others think of your actions and allow their words and even the very looks they give you to be an indicator of a course of action for your life, then you have allowed someone else to set a course of direction for you.

To be quite honest, you might be shocked just how little others are actually thinking about you.

I am always amazed at the amount of ego that is present when someone is so invested in others thoughts about their actions. Often it is someone who is very self-conscious and, on the outside, seems very non-egoic. But it is usually just the opposite. The ego has such a hold on them that they base every action on the ideas, words and presumed thoughts of others.

One of my favorite quotes i use for my clients is one from Dr. Seuss where he says, “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”

Way 3: Worry From Others is Often Judgement of Your Journey. Don’t Judge, Just Live

It is your journey. Things are only Bad or Good in the context of the moment, but it is always your journey. No one can worry you better, angry, happy or any other emotion that others desire to afflict you with. Only you can determine the beauty of any Now Moment.

Feel this Present Moment, for it is the only one you have.

Be your own creation and do not allow others to infect their egoic natures on you, for they are on their own journey as well. If you truly can let people say what they must to you and simply say, “Thank you” and then say “that is your journey to think as much and it really is none of my business what you think of mine but I appreciate you for who you are.”

This will always stop the conversation for their really is nowhere else for them to go from there. The key here is to mean it with a sincere heart for you do recognize that their journey is what it is as is yours.

In the end, it really does come down to the fact that what others think of you is, indeed, none of your business…ever!

Be a Person of Quality. Direct Your Power.

Until then…

Be Excellent, Expect the Best!

Let me Know your Thoughts Below, Follow this Blog, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

dasouthern@directyourpower.comDA Southern is an Author, Speaker, Blogger and a Personal Development Life Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for Coaching or Speaking @ dasouthern@directyourpower.com

The Kindness in Struggle: There is None – 3 Ways to Be Free of Struggle

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The buzzword of the current era seems to be organic; Organic growing stuff. Organic fashion. Organic architecture. The list goes on and on, like we all of a sudden discovered organic living.

It is as if we discovered this new awareness, and i can see in our tech-driven society how we need a feeling in our living environment that seems natural, hence the very expression of organic.

But it is not new at all, but essentially it is a state of mind, a way to see the world in terms of living with a sense of no-struggle. That is at the heart of organic anything; a sense that it comes naturally and looks at one with its environment.

This is at the heart of all of this organic gardening that has cropped up (pun intended) in the last decade.

But, wait, something seems familiar about organic growing of stuff and organics, itself.

It is the very nature of history before we implemented the struggle of trying to squeeze massive growth from a single acre of land and in our very living. It is before chemicals and pesticides became the end-all-to-beat all to maximize yield and all of that agricultural talk that cause most to have a deer-in-the-headlight look at the mere mention of such talk.

Now, i am not against prosperity at all, but it is struggle that i rail against in that it is not organic at all. Struggle in life and the way you become the expansive creatures that you are destined to be is what is anti-organic to me.

Here is where i lose many in the discussion in that for some odd reason, struggle has become acceptable as a way of showing that we are growing. The ‘no-pain-no-gain’ idea is that if we don’t struggle in some way, we are not growing to our full potential.

This is why, in our society, some banter about such terms as ‘struggling artist’ or whatever else someone is struggling at. Trust me, it is not the artist that is struggling, it is society that tries to define artist and put them in a box that somehow needs to be established for such types. Artist don’t ever struggle with their art, just with the means in which it must fulfill them.

Lose the Struggle: 3 Ways to Begin the Process

We have all been put on this beautiful floating rock in space and time for a purpose. There is no struggle here, but to allow your purpose to manifest and become the expansion that you are to be. Confucius said, “Love what you do and you will never work a day in your life.” Essentially, no struggle.

Way 1: Decide That You Are No Longer Vested in Struggle

As was said, organic living is a state of mind, so you must first decide that struggle is not part of your existence. Think about any form of struggle, is it every a healthy existence? You struggle if you try to swim against a current, right?

Such is life.

We are not creatures that are destined to struggle in that sense. It is a mindset that we have accepted for ourselves that must be lost within before it can be lived without.

Because struggle has become an expected norm, the ego will rail against you becoming a free creature as it has vested itself it that struggle. That is where the ego rests, within the struggle of life, for it knows that you need it to supply all the excuses and insecurities that go along with struggle.

Way 2: Find Your Own Way

This is the bridge to the way out of struggle that you have been squashing within you. This is the purpose that manifest in all areas of your life that you may be unaware of. Look at what you do and the various activities that hold your attention.

What are the common threads?

Begin to take back the organic way that life is supposed to be lived by reclaiming the truth of your purpose. There is only this Now Moment in which to do so.

Why is it that people seem to have to struggle until they ‘retire’ and then live their purpose? Why do we buy into that kind of thinking that the ego promises; always a better tomorrow but today is better left to the struggles of life?

Find your own way to live free of struggle and of the traps that are egoic in nature.

Way 3: Do Your Purpose With a Single Focus

What i have noticed about a sense of purpose that people discover for themselves; the ego seems to serve up a helping of guilt along side of it. It is as if you are not really supposed to ‘do that kind of thing now’ but stay grounded in some reality that the ego has provided for you.

Your purpose is designed to infuse your life like yeast does in baking. A small amount affects the entire loaf of bread. That is purpose. It manifest itself in everything you do because it is what you are. No matter what your purpose, do it with a focus on being the best within that purpose. Live you life around your purpose, not the other way around.

Purpose is that blade of grass covered over by cement; sooner or later the cement cracks and the grass must break free. The single, solitary blade of grass breaks through tons of cement.

You are no different.

Break free. Discover your purpose. Don’t allow struggle to be part of your mindset. The only organic way to live is free from struggle.

It is your journey. Live it free of struggle.

Be a Person of Quality. Direct Your Power.

Until then…

Be Excellent, Expect the Best!

Let me Know your Thoughts Below, Follow this Blog, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

dasouthern@directyourpower.comDA Southern is an Author, Speaker, Blogger and a Personal Development Life Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for Coaching or Speaking @ dasouthern@directyourpower.com

3 Ways To Stop Being Held As A Prisoner of War Within Your Mind

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When i was a kid, i remember seeing the old comedy show, Hogan’s Heroes, about a prisoner of war camp during the Second World War.

The shows premise was that the POWs were actually active war participants, using the camp as a base of operations for Allied espionage and sabotage against the Germans or the German Armed Forces.

The prisoners could leave and return almost at will via a secret network of tunnels and had radio contact with Allied command. They were aided by the incompetence of the camp commandant, Colonel Klink, and the rather more complex motivations of Sergeant of The Guard Sergeant Schultz.

Colonel Hogan would routinely manipulate the incompetent Klink and get Schultz to look the other way while Hogan’s men conducted secret operations. Klink and Schultz were in constant terror of being transferred to the Russian Front, and Hogan took pains to keep the hapless German duo firmly in place.

Schultz was quite aware that the prisoners were carrying out some sort of mischief, but deliberately ignored it in order to maintain the status quo.

It was all fun and games as the actual war was now 20 years over at the time the show was broadcast and time to start having fun with it all, i suppose.

But i am struck with the similarities of how we are POWs within our own minds.

You see, i believe us to be prisoners to our egoic nature and, like the show, we seem to be willing to allow ourselves to be used by allied command, the ego, for all kinds of shenanigans.

Unfortunately, we will never be allowed to leave as the ego has decided that you are not worthy to become the expansive creatures who relish living in the beauty of each Now Moment.

You see, by keeping you forever trapped by a guilt-ridden past and a future that is full of angst, for the details of your life must always be planned out or you are just a failure, we are kept as POWs forever hoping the war might end.

But like in the show where the POWs were content to stay put to do the secret operations, we too, seem to be content with ceding our lives to the ego to manage. I mean, isn’t it just easier to live in guilt and regret of the things we should have done and to put our desires into some hope of a glorious future that will happen when our ship comes in?

3 Ways to Release Yourself to Live Free

The ego is never a tyrannical dictator as the aspect of divine providence within for freedom would always rise to the surface.

No, instead, the ego is indeed like Allied Command, making it seem as if you are part of the overall plan for success.

Way 1: Understand the Way You Are Being Held Captive

This is indeed different for everyone as the ego is subtle in its design. It is forever dwelling on that which will make you stay put as a prisoner but making it seem as if you are a full participant in the process. If it is guilt about something in your past, regret about some situation that you had no control over or whatever it is your ego has decided that t needs to keep you bound, you need to understand for yourself the way you are being kept prisoner.

The key here is to understand the feelings and emotions, yet never judge them. When you allow yourself to judge them, you become the victim and then the prisoner. Judgement always reflects on the one who judges.

Way 2: Understand that the Tunnels that Lead Away Have Always Been There

Believe it or not, there is a symbiotic relationship that you have with your ego. You know the tunnels are there, the ego knows you can be free, yet does not try and stop you from using them. However, the ego tells you that the tunnels are simply used for missions but that the place of safety and security is always behind the barbed wire of the camp.

When you can make sense of the “why” then the access to the tunnels becomes a bit easier to begin to see that the true freedom can only come when you decide to use the tunnels for a one-way trip out.

There is never any safety and security as a Prisoner of War but there is clarity when you understand that life begins when you do. This means shedding your reliance on the ego and allowing yourself to step into the fresh sunlight of your Present Moments. Only there can you find yourself waiting.

Way 3: Understand that There is No Safety Ever in the Realm of the Ego

The tendency to retreat back into the camp is so dominant as you come to truly live free. The ego has assured you that the missions were as free as you needed to be, but that you will always be the safest behind the barbed wire that encloses it. The ego will tell you that it is in charge but that everything you do is vital to the success of the war.

You believed it.

Well, you used to, but no longer. Yes, the freedom of accepting yourself for who you are can be daunting. The freedom to be free of judgement of yourself and of others can be exhilarating, yet scary, at the same time. It has been such a fall-back position that the ego has used to bolster your view of yourself, right?

But once you have lived in the realm of freedom of yourself, from yourself, you begin to see the uselessness of the ego and the temptation to retreat back into the tunnels.

It is not a journey back you should ever desire. It is like when someone loses weight and gains it back and it is more difficult, or so it seems, to lose the weight again. It is just easy to retreat back into old patterns of guilt, regret and judgement.

Don’t go there.

Be a person who is free of the encampments of the mind and of the ego, for there, in the details of each Now Moment, life is waiting.

Be a Person of Quality. Direct Your Power.

Until then…

Be Excellent, Expect the Best!

Let me Know your Thoughts Below, Follow this Blog, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

dasouthern@directyourpower.comDA Southern is an Author, Speaker, Blogger and a Personal Development Life Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for Coaching or Speaking @ dasouthern@directyourpower.com

Define Yourself: 3 Ways to Maintain Clarity of Focus

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There are a sea of floating definitions of ourselves at any given moment just waiting to become your primary focus.  They are individual traits and characteristics, and yes, even some insecurities thrown in for good measure, floating on little rafts just shouting at you to ‘pick me, pick me’.

And we do for whatever moment seems to apply, we reach to the raft that seems to be making the most noise at any given moment.

You see, there is a definition of yourself that is the one that all other definitions should revolves around. However in our disposable society where we get cell phones as often as we change underwear, it seems as if the very definition comes and goes like the tide as well.

Where this presents conflict within your soul is in the very definition of who you are is being compromised and so the ego uses this as a way to become the soul arbiter of all that surrounds you.

Often times it is just not pretty.

To become so enamored with who you are by the terms others set for you, be it at work or in your personal life, is to surrender the better part of yourself in the process.

We Are To Play The Role We Define Ourselves As

When i was doing a fair amount of directing, there was a sign that i had on the door leading into rehearsals that simply stated, “What ever you have done today, leave it on this side of the door, for when you walk through this door, you are defined by the role you are playing.”

What i was telling the actors was that they were to leave the trouble of the day behind them as this was their clarity of focus for the next several hours.

Such can be said for life in general. We are defined by the role we are playing and that role should then become the sun of our universe that has the subsidiary hats that we adopt at any given moment as our planetary system. Essentially, our definition of who we are gives warmth and energy to the other traits that we may be at any given moment.

3 Ways To Define Yourself With Clarity of Focus

 

Way 1: The Center of You is What Gives Warmth to Your Soul

This can not be stated enough. You must define your true core and then live it in such a way so as to impact all other definition who desire to be you. To find this simply look at what it is that brings you the most joy in your life. I am not talking of the external, because most would say their family and friends.

No, what i am talking about is the truth of who you are. If you are having trouble, start by looking at the qualities that your family and friends bring to you and the joy aspect that are the relationships. There is a joy-factor that must be ferreted out to determine your core. Focus on that and really examine the feelings they they bring to you and you can then begin to piece together a soulful journey to your core.

Way 2: Do Not Allow the Voices of Other Definitions to Define You

This is one of the hardest aspect of your journey as others and the ego seeks to remake you in their own image. The sad part is that we often allow them so that we can simply ‘get along’ and ‘not make waves’.

This is a tragic way to live as, many times, we start to believe ‘own press’ as the old expression goes. We fall into the trap of the loudest voice of the definition of ourselves and we become jaded and out of step with who we are internally.

This is where the internal conflict then begins as we struggle to combine realities but never successfully doing so. Find your sun and allow it to become the guiding influence.

Way 3: Understand That the Further You Go From Your Core Concept, the Weaker You Become.

Often times when i am coaching a client, they seem as if they almost become a victim to the various definitions in that it becomes easy to blame the definitions as they are not really them. Being a victim is, then, very, very easy always giving you a way to say like the old expression from comic Flip Wilson, ‘The devil made me do it.’

It is just easier to have a scapegoat when you haven’t given your focus on what the defining aspect of who you are is and it is not front and center in your life.

Sometimes it is just easier to succumb to the pressure because it is the way you have always done it.

But it is as i have often described anyone of creative intellect; Your creative self is like a blade of grass covered with cement. No matter what the talent, no matter how much life and the people in your life cover up that blade of grass (your creative self, your core) with cement, at some point in time, it must poke through. It must find the sun, the energy that sustains it. It must.

In the end, life and who you are at your core will become your truth. Maybe it will finally arrive later in life, but no matter when it arrives, allow the growth to flourish.

For in the end, the only you that must exist is the you that is meant to reach a greater plane of existence.

Be a Person of Quality. Direct Your Power.

Until then…

Be Excellent, Expect the Best!

Let me Know your Thoughts Below, Follow this Blog, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

directyourownlife@gmail.comDA Southern is an Author, Speaker, Blogger and a Personal Development Life Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for Coaching or Speaking directyourownlife@gmail.com

Desire and Perseverance: 3 Questions to Ask to See if Your Desire is Your Truth

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I was once speaking at a two-day seminar and, is the occasion for such events, some of the speakers went a tad longer than thought. Good for the attendees as they certainly got back in time and money they had invested in the event.

But over the course of the two days, i noticed an elderly lady that sat about four rows back and was just smiling the entire time as she listened to the speakers. I was intrigued and after one of the sessions, went over to speak to her.

Obviously, i was curious why she was so intent to be at the seminar and, as we walked together outside to get some fresh air, she grabbed my hand and said, “I just never stop living, honey. I keep expanding as that is what God intends.” She went on to say, “You see, older folks, not me…” She said as she smiled. (You see, later i learned, through our conversation, that she was over ninety years young.)

She continued, “Most older folks, for some reason, think that they know it all, or have no desire to increase after a certain age. They get in the mindset that they have no value, that this is simply a younger person’s world. They have lost all desire to be expansive creatures and with desire usually goes perseverance as it is just easy to say I’m too old.”

Needless to say, i learned more that day than did probably anyone attending, at least to me.

The key point she said to me that i never forgot was the statement, “They have lost all desire to be expansive creatures and with desire usually goes perseverance as it is just easy to say I’m too old.”

The Interconnectedness of Desire and Perseverance

That started me on my own personal quest within myself, with the people i coached and with all i came into contact with. Desire and Perseverance, their interconnectedness.and the way we operate within them.

You see, the two are often so symbiotic that we don’t sometimes even realize it. The challenge is that in today’s world, it seems as if everything is a desire without a purpose. It’s just a desire and, darn it all, i want it now.

And here is the kicker in today’s consciousness; If i don’t get it, life is unfair, the rich have cheated me, the government needs to take of it, on on it goes. And why? Because we supposedly have a right to all of our desires. Somehow, along the way, the pursuit of happiness became, “I have a right to all my desires.”

But here is what is missing…Perseverance.

You see, the Universe makes no mistakes and TRUE desires will always come with a perseverance level that is a natural part of the process. Most find that when they have a true desire, that perseverance is the bridge that carries you between the moments of self-doubt that the ego will invade you with in those moment when desire wanes.

Perseverance is the undercurrent that carries you down stream even when you believe yourself on a still patch on the river of life. It gets many words such as passion, self belief, or whatever other current expression is being tossed about. The point is, it really is the ability to persevere in times when you think you can’t.

The Questions You Ask to See if Your Desire is Your Truth

I am not a firm believer in procrastination as i am of the mindset that anything we desire to do, we do it. So, often times it is my pursuit to allow a coaching client the freedom to discover their true desires.

Question 1: Does Your Desire Move You?

Once, as i was coaching a client, she stated to me how she had always desired to go to Hawaii. As she talked about it and how, during the down times in her life, she would just think of lying on the beaches there and the experience of what it would be like to do so.

After listening, i asked her if she would do me a favor; would she go out and spend money on magazines and cut out pictures of Hawaiian beaches, hotels and anything else that was strictly Hawaii  and place them everywhere around her house and report back the experience.

She thought for a moment and then said, “Probably not. It would be too much of a hassle to get magazines and pay for them. I’ll just look at pictures on the Internet.”

I was not shocked, really, as i then knew that she was in love with the idea of the desire and was not actually being moved by it. A true desire has to move you into each Now Moment with a purpose. Maybe it is not all-consuming entity, but it is always there moving you. There is a sweet perseverance that is always like the undercurrent pulling you forward.

Question 2: Do You Allow Others to Influence Your Desires?

Do you take what others say about desires that you have and influence them? Do you truly care that others think your desires are stupid, dumb or impossible?

By the way, if they are a true desire, they are always inspired by the Universe and, therefore, no words can be attached to them as they are yours alone. But if others can sway you, maybe your desires are only ideas of desires that you adore.

Watching American Idol and the audition process, i am always amused when someone says that so-and-so “kept” them from auditioning as they didn’t support them in their quest. Like you need any ones support, ever.

Yes, it would be grand for the world to line up behind you and slap you on the back and tell you that you can do it. But, quite frankly, it is always a solitary journey and if others cheer you on, great, but they are not the ones who live for you. Again, it is the undercurrent of perseverance that pulls you forward into the true desire.

Question 3: Does Not Attaining The Desire Pain You More Than the Idea of Not Even Trying?

The essential question here is: Do you believe that you were given this from your Creator as something that is you? Do you feel the pain of the desire unfulfilled is something more than you could possibly bare? I am not talking a drama-type of desire that we all have had. You know, the “I will just die if this or that doesn’t happen!”

You won’t.

No, what i am speaking of is that part of you that feels incomplete if you are not persevering towards the desire. Even in spans of time that nothing seems to be happening, it is always there and, whether you understand it or not, your actions are leading you to that desire.

When the pain of not attaining a desire is greater that any other emotion, and there is a truth within the desire that maybe you can’t really explain, then the desire finds its own perseverance.

The desire is your truth and perseverance is your constant companion. From there, life expands outward and joy lives within.

It is the way of life.

Be a Person of Quality. Direct Your Power.

Until then…

Be Excellent, Expect the Best!

Let me Know your Thoughts Below, Follow this Blog, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

directyourownlife@gmail.comDA Southern is an Author, Speaker, Blogger and a Personal Development Life Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for Coaching or Speaking directyourownlife@gmail.com

Upgrade Your Game Characters; 3 Tips to Upgrade Your Life

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If you have every played any video game whatsoever, be it a simple flash game or a full-blown immersing experience with a game console, then you know that the object of any video game is to move your character through the gaming platform on some type of mission.

Be it a quest or a shoot-em-up, the experience is basically designed around your characters gaining of points in whatever form that takes, and then Upgrading your guns, shielding, skills or whatever to become better as the levels become more difficult.

The point here is to be constantly Upgrading yourself to prepare yourself for the upcoming battles within the game.

Such is life.

The very experiences of life are nothing more than the constant Upgrading of your ever-increasing skill set that advances you to the next level of play. That is the nature of schooling, (well it was the original intent) but to prepare you by advancing your skill sets in tiny little increments so that when you are ‘all grown up’, you are ready for the world.

As a director, it was my pursuit to guide the actors from one skill set of not being confident in their abilities to even read the dialog convincingly, to another, being able to stand on stage and perform so as to move the audience in the way the play was intended.

Such is life.

You see, we are always to be expanding ourselves in such a way so as to Upgrade ourselves to the next level. It is what we were designed to do by our Creator, it is the very nature of the universe itself – expansion.

This is the danger of our modern-day thinking that everything should be provided for us. This is the tenants of Communism and Socialism in that, the premise is that if everything is provided, then we are just naturally happy.

The opposite is true.

Loss Aversion

As a Strategic Life Coach, i have see transformations in people who, by and large, are seeking just that. Most who desire coaching understand that they need to indeed Upgrade themselves but they are usually, by nature, people of character already that demand that of themselves. They have just stalled on a level and need to see other possibilities so as to be able to Upgrade.

I seldom coach anyone who has decided that the government or that some ‘job’ should give them security in some respect. People who are looking for constant security are the very ones who usually don’t seem to have it in any way in their lives.

It is called Loss Aversion, or simply put, an attitude of lack. The very nature of always looking for security is the admitting to yourself that you are lacking and all you are really doing is trying not to lose anything.

So, Loss Aversion refers to people’s tendency to strongly prefer avoiding losses than to acquiring gains. Some studies suggest that losses are twice as powerful, psychologically, as gains. This then leads to Risk Aversion when people evaluate a possible gain; since people prefer avoiding losses to making gains.

Essentially, it comes from a lack attitude. You prefer to not Upgrade.

If you were playing some game that was a shoot-em-up, essentially, you would just hide behind some wall so you would not take the chance on getting shot. You would never gains points to later upgrade your shielding, your guns, or gain more lives in the game. You prefer to be lacking as it serves you, for whatever reason.

3 Tips to Set the Course to Upgrade Your Life

 

Tip 1: Understand that Your Were Designed to Always Be Upgrading

If, for whatever reason, you have become stagnant in your pursuit from a career standpoint, or in a personal endeavor, then you need to stop and look to see if you, not any other person, place or thing, have decided to ‘hide behind a wall’. Really ask yourself if you are in someway practicing Loss Aversion and why?

You see, it is a simple thing to blame someone else, or some condition, for your inability to desire to Upgrade. It is just easier sometimes to wait it out behind the wall of life and hope you don’t have to bother with it. But we were not designed that way.

When your green you are growing, when you are ripe, you are rotten.

Tip 2: Be Willing to Change the Dynamics of the Game

I look at this as a reboot of sorts. When a computer virus infects your computer and things seem to begin to act badly within the system, you have to essentially give the old system an enema to flush out the virus.

Heck, Scotty and Geordi La Forge were always doing it on the Enterprise in Star Trek. Rebooting the warp core because some alien was trying to muck up the works.

Sometimes we have to understand if some alien is trying to do the same to us. However, most of the time, the alien is us. Our thinking has become so pointed to some type of Loss Aversion that we stop Upgrading.

Oh, it is not that you aren’t capable, we all are. It is that you have decided to just not do so. You have to be willing to say, ‘I need an Upgrade and I am willing to shake up things so it happens.’

What ever you have to do, this Now Moment is the time it happens. If you can’t decide to move from behind that wall Now, then don’t bother. The decision is always Now.

Tip 3: Commit to the Upgrade

This is the step where so many fall back behind the wall on.

They know they need to Upgrade. They have identified the challenge that is preventing them from Upgrading, but they have decided not to commit to it. They peek out from behind the wall, take a couple of shots, then go back behind the wall and tell themselves that, this too, isn’t working. They then presume it is everything else that is causing them to not advance, even the wall itself.

But the wall doesn’t care if you advance or not. It is just there, as are most of you perceived challenges. They are just there.

It is as if you have to almost take a “Butch and Sundance” approach to it all.

At the end of the classic movie, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, the two were pinned down by the Mexican army, on their last rounds of ammunition. The last scene showed them just charging out from behind the walls of the building and then the scene froze as we heard the sounds of gunfire erupt.

They committed to the upgrade!

So, too, should you. It could just become the most exhilarating and liberating experience of your life.

We are not in this life to become complacent, to not Upgrade, or to become so engrossed in a security mindset that we forget about living. You are a creature of expansion. Live as such.

Be a Person of Quality. Direct Your Power.

Until then…

Be Excellent, Expect the Best!

Let me Know your Thoughts Below, Follow this Blog, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

directyourownlife@gmail.comDA Southern is an Author, Speaker, Blogger and a Strategic Life Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for Coaching or Speaking directyourownlife@gmail.com

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