Bubbles and the Ego; 3 Ways to Allow Your Bubble to Float Freely

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google plus circlesThe newest rage in Social Media circles is, well, circles. When Google+ introduced the concept of grouping together people in the logical way that we arrange people in our lives, it made sense.

Have you every blown those bubbles you get at the Dollar Store just for fun? Kids love doing it but why do we lose the simple joy of doing so as adults? Purchase a jar of bubbles soon and just enjoy them so that you can free yourself to think in a Universal Way for a bit.

You see, life itself is really, in a sense, a constant arrangement of circles that seem to float about like bubbles. When two or three or whatever intersect they form a new circle, but the bubbles are fluid and ever changing. Some float seemingly alone for a bit and then others are interconnected always, it would so seem, with other bubbles as that is their nature.

The ego tends to want to control you in such a way as to label the very movement of the bubbles and the way they are connected.

How does the ego do it?

The ego uses various aspects of life that seemingly make sense to us, on the surface, but insecurities are at the heart of all egoic tendencies. The ego takes feelings and emotions and heightens them to become almost seemingly irrational aspects of the way we feel and act.

However, it always makes sense to us. The secret is to allow the bubbles to float free to begin with and never even allow the ego to become involved in anything.

3 Ways To Allow Yours and Others Bubbles to Float Free of Ego

When you notice the very beauty of a bubble, you can see that it seems to be a little piece of perfection floating in time and space. Why then would you allow anything such as the ego to label it or try to control it.

Way 1: Understand the Very Nature of Bubbles

They do best when made and allowed to just float. Yes, we try to control them by giving them waves of our hands or blowing on them to keep them afloat, but usually, when left alone, they will complete their journey that they are destined for. The ego is always trying to control the very nature and path of the bubbles of life. Understand that we are all on our own journey and that each life, each bubble, is a perfection unto itself. Allow people to take their own journeys by not becoming an ego-driven creature based in insecurities.

Way 2: Never Force Connections as They Will Occur Naturally

One thing the ego loves to do is force connections where there are none. I suppose we best see this played out in the aspect of love.

In reality TV, in movies and TV shows, we see that very set-up as a way to enter into a drama situation that is suppose to rivet you to your seat. Well, as that is the intent, it grabs us because, while we may scoff at the antics of some TV or movie character that is mismatched in love, and we know it, it is familiar ground as most have been there in some way within their own bubbles. The forcing of love where there need not be.

The idea that we force any connection, be it a relationship or some event in time and space that is not a natural fit for us, is a way to misshape your bubble.

You have done that while blowing bubbles have you not? Tried to blow many together in such a way that the circle is almost hideous looking and it very seldom last. In fact, often times the bubble cannot even float and drops to the ground and disintegrates before our eyes.

This is the very nature of forced connections in life and in love.

Way 3: Every Bubble Will Travel and Complete its Journey

As much as we allow the ego to try to manipulate others with our words and actions, ultimately we must decide to not become that creature who is so concerned with the actions of others that it causes our actions to be nothing but reactions. That is never a journey worth taking as it is fraught with insecurities in every aspect of living.

Like the bubble, the journey will start at its creation and end with its bursting at its predestined time. But here is the beauty of the bubble. It does not ever truly end. Like us, it just becomes too big for its soapy casing and must become something else.

Like the bubble, we, too, expand past our shell at what many think is the ending, but is truly a new beginning. Allow your bubble and everyone you interact with, to be free of the ego that tries to manipulate and control its course with forced connections.

Live free and float naturally on the winds of time free from the egoic nature that tries to control us all. For there is where life truly exists in its simplicity.

Be a Person of Quality. Direct Your Power.

Until then…

Be Excellent, Expect the Best!

Let me Know your Thoughts Below, Follow this Blog, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.


Commitment: 3 Ways to Live the Idea


Commitment is one of those words that, for whatever the reason, has become nothing more than fodder for the advancement of the ego. Granted, the very word conjures up a prideful look at the core of who we are in everything we do.

Marketers us it to instill a sense of excellence in our minds;

The commitment to detail

We are committed to a relationship

We are committed to success

We are committed to making something work

We are committed to our families

The list goes on and on, does it not? How could we possibly derive any sense of egoic nature here. How could the ego possibly be involved with something so noble, so filled with hopefulness?

Indeed, how could it?

Well, we should look at first the actual meaning and, then, get to the heart of the matter, Commitment as an idea.

The dictionary says of commitment that it is The Act of Committing or the State of Being Committed and it is Dedication; Application. The synonyms for committed are; charge, committal, devoir (chore or task), duty, engagement, guarantee, liability, must, need, ought, pledge, promise, responsibility, undertaking, vow, and word. Some of the Antonyms are; broken promise, denial, and refusal.

Looking over the list, it is extremely easy how the ego turns the very word into ways to get you away from living in the Present Moment and keeps your feet in the past and on a future-only vision that is filled with hope and achievement.

Now at the core, that doesn’t sound wrong but admirable, right?

But let’s look at it this way. We are creatures of joy and the reason we are here is to experience joy and expansion as human creations. We do things that brings us joy and if there is an obligation attached to something, the joy of doing so is diminished. Especially look at the antonyms in the list above and you can see where the ego would come in through the back door to plant a foothold on you. No one wants to break a promise, right?

At the heart of the matter here is the idea that commitment brings. It is, as stated in the definition, a “State of Being” and that is what is missed by many when trying to internalize the word commitment. Commitment, at its core, is that place that you are really comfortable with who you are in whatever it is you do. There is no hierarchy of emotions that are attached to any given even in your life for you are grounded with a sense of purpose for the perfection of Now. You are committed to this Present Moment and are excellent Now.

Lets look at ways to become the very idea of commitment.

3 Ways to Live the Idea of Commitment

Way 1: Understand that at the Heart of Commitment is only What Your Bring to it

You must move away from the concept of the long list of attributes that the ego ties you up in with the very word of commitment and begin to see yourself as a person of quality in this Now Moment alone. No matter how many ‘broken promises’ the ego tries to ties you to, it matters not. You are here and you are a being of excellence. There is only one place any commitment happens and that is Now.

Way 2: Understand that Others Cannot Insist on a Commitment Level from You

This is a trick one in that you are committed to your family, your pursuits, your friends, but here is the key here; YOU are the one committed. When someone decides for you, and you even allow it, you give away your power and the ego either strikes out in different ways or is engaged in the pursuit if getting your power back in the form of over-achieving or whatever else is needed by the ego to advance you. Essentially. you are taken away from being excellent for yourself in this Now Moment and are taken on a journey that is someones journey for you.

Way 3: Understand That There is No Obligation in Commitment

Anything you do for others, you do for yourself. That is why the concept of giving is so very important and that even if you have little to give in a monetary sense, the giving can be time and talents, if nothing else. The point here is that it is never a condition of the head, but always of the heart.

Commitment is an idea of excellence and when the ego subverts it in ways of an obligation, you become entangled in the journey of others and no longer a creature of excellence of though, word and deed in this Present Moment.

Let the past go and any ideas of commitments that may have fallen short. It no longer matters and if someone holds something over your head, that is no longer your business, but it is there journey alone. It is no longer any of your business what others think of you. The only commitment anyone truly has is ti themselves and the ideas of excellence they bring to each Present Moment.

Be that person. Direct Your Power.

Until next time…

Be Excellent, Expect the Best!

Let me Know your Thoughts Below, Follow this Blog, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

The Mission of the Vision

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Vision was discussed in relation to goals in the previous post as something to aspire to.

Briefly we discussed goals as merely a subset of the larger vision of a life with a purpose, a Mission for your eternal pursuits.

However, in this ego-driven culture, Mission is often left to those ‘starving artist” and those who dedicate their selves to helping those in need in some remote part of the world or in some place of dire need in our own country.

A Mission often seems to be left to politicians that supposedly have the social good in mind, which we usually discover is seldom the case. Even the very definition of Mission from the dictionary alludes to missions from a standpoint of political and humanitarian efforts.

Therein lies the disconnect.

When we look at Mission then in the eyes of a cynical world, and with an ego that is constantly looking out for your own interest, it seems that a Mission is not really something that everyone is involved in, or should be, for far too many have corrupted the very meaning of the word.

The eternal creator of the universe did not set us adrift to be at the whim of a society that cares not but, in the eternal scheme of it all, desires nothing more than people with vision to lead them into a new age of enlightenment.

Here is where the ego usually shuts the discussion down as Enlightenment, Vision and Missions are certainly not practical. The egoic mind desires only to keep you forever tied to the past and worried about the future in a way to keep you focused on self-preservation, there will certainly be no talk of a Mission outside of yourself, for that is the very act of acknowledging an eternal presence that has no place in the ego-centric mind. Mission stuff is “out there” and reality is nothing more than your failures of the past and of the future, which is always to be worried about.

Often the heartaches of the past, the ego will tell you, would not even allow you to think that YOU, of all people, could have a Mission that could impact the world. This is precisely why you should think of a Mission for your life. Yes, it is tied to Vision and the two are usually so interwoven that it seems to be a daunting task to even conceive of it.

The ego tells you that you are not worthy for greatness, that you cant change the world, that “out there” pursuits are best left to those who are rich, or are crafty or whatever else the ego tells you to disavow that need within divinely given to you to create. The ego is crafty as them all by telling you that until you get to a certain status, income or whatever, that this Mission stuff be best left to those who have the ability to do so.

In the theatre, there is a much heralded saying that says, “There are no small parts, only small actors.” Of course, it has been misused as a quote used to those who get small parts in a production who desired bigger roles, but the concept is not without merit. I learned that early on when i, too, desired a bigger part and got a smaller role. In a sense, it was that role that turned on a switch for me as i discovered the power of a smaller role and the truth about all parts of a production.

I even illustrated this point to a cast of actors during a production once. It seemed that they were being a bit disrespectful to the backstage crew, essentially being talent-snobs, as i would call them, and i set out to prove the dynamic of that saying. I told the actors that they would do the show at the rehearsal with the crew watching. As the show progressed, the actors struggled doing all of the things they took for granted that the crew did to make them look good.

It proved a point that those actors learned about appreciation for all who were involved in the show at every level.

There is even a larger lesson that came from that lesson, and that was appreciation for the Mission in general. The ego is such a controlling core concept that appreciation is lost for living in general. Life is a struggle, the ego tells you, and there is no way to appreciate EVERYTHING.

This is at the very core of your Mission. Appreciation for the journey and for the freedom to allow the Mission to become you.

In the next post, come back for the ways to manifest that within yourself and maybe you will find that your Mission has been in front of your eyes without your knowledge.

Let me know your thoughts below, get on the newsletter list HERE, and share with your friends, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.


directyourownlife@gmail.comDA Southern is a Strategic Personal Development Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching directyourownlife@gmail.com

Move Forward With A Great Attitude

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As a Now Moment coach, and the obligatory beginning of the New Year, (which I am not so apt to observe as stated in the last post) I thought we would just build a scenario as we posts here within the framework of putting together a theatre production. In so doing, we will have a continuous dialog on the issues that people are dealing with and the way to move forward and how to adapt your life to become more in this Now Moment

The theme today is Your “Attitude”

It is a place of beginnings of everything you do, for if your attitude is lacking, the task at hand will be lacking along with your attitude.

Let me give you an example.

When a Director sits down with his production staff and they set out to begin the process of producing the next show to be done (usually the plays are chosen in advance, a season at a time, but the process is the same), the very first thing they look at is the attitude of the theatre-going public, and therefore what it is that they will desire; essentially, what will the theatre going public come to see?

From there, they look to the general “attitude” of the show itself. Is it a musical, a drama, a comedy? What are the characters like and what kinds of attitude are they looking to from those who audition?

As a Director, you always have a concept of the part, not of who should be playing the part so much, as every actor brings a different attitude to the role, but the general overall attitude of the role. I have cast people who were not as good of singers in a musical, for example, but brought a tremendous chemistry, an overall attitude, to the role. This could make all the difference in the way a play is perceived.

It is is same as you begin to look at an opportunity or challenge that you face. As stated previously, it is the questions you ask at the beginning that help you frame the task ahead. The key here is the attitude you bring to the questions, as well as the answers, and it is crucial that you approach opportunities and challenges with a superb attitude.

There is an old maxim that goes, “Your Attitude determines your Altitude” and it goes without saying that if you don’t bring a great attitude into the challenge/opportunity, then there is not much chance that you will succeed at the task.

Why? Because if you are not fully invested with an incredible passion for the answers your questions pose, then why bother in the first place?

Hey, I am speaking from experience here, trust me. I’ve learned the hard way that by not being honest with yourself and by not living in this Now Moment by asking great questions and having an attitude that accompanies the answers you know the universe will give you, then there is an expectation that will never be fulfilled. Inevitably, there will be failure, which leads to a myriad of domino-like attitudes about yourself that doom Now Moment living.

Here are three ways to adopt a new attitude.

First, find the parts of the challenge/opportunity that create a passion in you. (Yes, even with challenges there are elements that inspire you. It may be nothing more than the person that is involved with you. Whatever, find that part and seize it.)

Second, after aligning your passion point, now frame it as a pursuit. Let me explain. I have developed within myself a disdain for the word….work. I no longer look towards work but, instead, look to the word, Pursuit. Reason being is that within the word pursuit is the definition, “the act of striving” and one dictionary has attached to it, zeal. So no longer are you working at something. Instead, have a “zeal” for it. Find that part hat drives you and pursue it

Third, after zoning in on your zeal, “audition” the people and other aspects needed to get you to opening night with style. Remember, it is all about the attitude and not always is the most obvious choice the right one for you. Look at the attitude of whoever you bring on and will they bring that same attitude to the part you give them. Consequently, will you be able to derive a sense of attitude from other elements of the challenge/opportunity. Is that attitude suitable to you? Again, the most obvious choice is not always the one that brings you a great attitude. It is all about creating an attitude of gratitude for the zeal of the challenge/opportunity at hand.

Create a great attitude and the results will be manifest from the universal realm. It is a universal law.

Let me know your thoughts and share with your friends. The greater the conversation, the better we move forward in this Now Moment.


directyourownlife@gmail.comDA Southern is a Now Moment coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 30 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing the beauty of this Now Moment with a renewed passion for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching directyourownlife@gmail.com

It’s Not the Resolutions But the Questions We Ask to Become Better

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 What is it About New Beginnings That the New Year Brings?

As a Now Moment Coach, I am often amazed at the hoopla given to a calendar date as is New Years Day. At the core of it all, I understand the significance of the celebration, but it is all fairly predictable, is it not?

Let me give you the cycle of discussion, such as it is, that we are exposed to during this time and the various stories that are written about that are inspired to feed your egoic nature..

The various “Best” and “Worse” lists in whatever you are interested in. (Either you are cool by being connected with the “Best” or you are made to feel better about yourself because something is worse that you in some way.)

Resolutions – the making and then, breaking, of them. (Again, we are losers for wanting to do something because we are lacking in some way to make them to begin with and then again for failing at our lack mentality when we break the resolutions.)

Weight loss/Health – We are evidently “guilty” of eating too much over the holiday period and are all a bunch of fatties and now we must “get in shape” or, at least, be shamed to think as much. (Here is simply a lack mentality of how you see yourself. Do you need to shape up? Maybe, but on your own terms, not someones dictates on how you should feel about yourself.)

Damn Ego needing to be fed!

But, I make no judgements. As a coach, it is my mission to bridge the gap between the feelings of anxiousness that does indeed accompany this time of the year according to the calendar and the truth of Now Moments that we all must exist in.

First, let me say that there are some things that I do appreciate about this time of the calendar year.

For one, people, by and large, are in better spirits, or, if nothing else, at least open to renewal. Also, great questions are asked to help you focus. It’s just too bad that we don’t engage this way at all times. Well, I mean to change that for you.

What do I mean?

  Well, people get reflective and tend to dwell on successes and failures of the year past (Usually, more on the failures as that is the proclivity of the human experience) and will ask thought-provoking and reflective questions that tend to refocus their efforts into the New Year.

This is good at its core, as it is great to be always evolving into a better you, but the drawbacks are that the thinking is most always future-based on an experience that is based firmly in the past, completely negating the present Now Moment, which is exactly what the ego desires. Keeping you tied up in the past (failures) and hopeful of a better future, keeps joy from being completely present in this Now Moment.

Yes, we are to learn from past experiences, but not to the point that they glorify some future that doesn’t exist as of yet. This the very nature of Now Moments. The past is simply a guide and the future is but an experience of Now Moment Actions. So this is the Moment that matters. Your past does not dictate your future. You dictate your future right NOW.

To Direct Your Own Life means you ask the right questions in each Now Moment. This is the important part of the questioning process; It is not someone else who may have a desire for the path you think you must take, for the goal will always be moving and the future will never be anything more than murky. It must be your journey alone that incorporates those around you. Therein lies the happiness factor; the individual journey taken with joy that lifts those around them in that same wake of joy. It is a universal law.

  Remember, again, it is not so much the state we are in, but the questions we must ask to free us so as to move forward, and, yes, some of that may mean we have to ask tough questions about the reason we are here in this present Now Moment state not to dwell in the past but to see the framework of this moment and adapt and change as needed.

By looking at the process as if you were in a theatrical production, it is essentially the rehearsal process here. We have rehearsed certain scenes to this point and we understand that we are now ready to rehearse another part of the play. We look back at the last scene to understand the context for this next stage of rehearsal. The past, the last scene, was merely a set up for the current piece we are rehearsing. It has no baring to the future but to set it up and work together to make the play all make sense at the end.

That is the framework of the questioning process; to set up the framework for the next scene of your life. Just allow it to flow and appreciate the journey to this point and allow the questions to guide you into the next Now Moment.

In the end, it is a matter of perspective and allowing yourself to flow in that place of peace that you must find to allow yourself the freedom to move forward.

For some reason, beer commercials always seem to have great slogans, but it is not the drinking that propelled me to like this, but the message of finding yourself in that happy place where you are free to create.

The slogan is “Find Your Beach” and it is great for the disgrace that are resolutions in general as well is the comparing of the past “failures” to some future happiness.

Indeed, if you do find your beach and allow an organic way of living to become your new reality, you will have no choice but to embrace this Now Moment alone.

This will be your guiding emotion for the Now Moments that make up your future.


directyourownlife@gmail.comDA Southern is a Now Moment coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 30 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing the beauty of this Now Moment with a renewed passion for life. Contact DA Southern for coaching directyourownlife@gmail.com

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