3 Ways We Can Seek To Separate Ourselves From Anxiety

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There are so many ways that anxiety seems to rear its ugly head, especially within a society that treasures achievement such as ours.

While there is nothing wrong with achieving as that is the Universal Way, (actually more expansion of who we are than achievement, per se.) the very nature of achievement sometimes seems to go against the act of living a victorious life.

One might call those strong words but i am not here to tread lightly as i have no desire to coddle anyone when it comes to living a life of excellence.

High Expectations of the Achieving Life

It seems as if we are expected to “BE” so much today, are we not?

But sometimes in the very act of becoming, we simply forget to just “Be”. We allow so many influences, from family and friends, to society-at-large, to set the tone for our living. We become, then, filled with an angst that stems from so many voices crying out to us, seeming in our own heads. It is the call of expectations of all in our lives who demand that we are “more”, whatever that is.

More than what? More than who? And more importantly, WHY?

The past beacons us, our “so-called” failures beseech us, our ego compares us and we sink deeper into the abyss, often falling on the weight of fears of a future that we can not support or even imagine.

Why are you anxious? What are the signs and symptoms we should be dealing with here? And, the real question; Who are you in the process?

As a Life Coach, this is the area that seems to be the most pressing for most i encounter. Anxiety, worry, angst, depression…they are all tied into a precarious knot that can doom many and even lead few to consider even taking their own lives.

But there is always a core that the anxiety covers and that is the journey we take to discover the beauty of living in the Present Moment, for here is where all truth lives. This is the Now Moment that we find a way up and out and into a new way of living.

But the ultimate truth is always our own journey that must be discovered. To truly rid yourself of the anxiety in any situation, or just in your daily living, you must do some basic self-reflection steps to have the insight to move forward. Be it with a Life Coach, or through meditation, or just taking yourself fishing…whatever it takes to gain some clarity, it needs to be done.

My father had a peculiar saying that he would spout when Alzheimer’s had taken its grip on him and that was, “Hey, did you stop and smell the roses?” Seemingly out of nowhere, he would interject the saying into conversations. Now my father would occasionally say that growing up, usually as a glib saying, but the simple fact is that there is an ultimate truth here for life. It is a quote that is thrown about so much that we do sometimes forget its significance.

A famous golfer, Ben Hogan, said it beautifully when he said, “As you walk down the fairway of life you must smell the roses, for you only get to play one round.”

3 Ways to Begin the Transition Away from Anxiety

Anxiety is a far reaching subject, to be sure, but as it was in the theatre, to get ready for the production of any theatrical production, there are things that have to happen before we even get to rehearsals. We have to consider a lot of factors before even choosing the show and consider all of the elements that go into the production.

The three ways we begin the process is similar then to getting ready for a show; separation, reflection and connection.

When preparing for a show, the separation usually comes from a director getting with the board of directors to choose a vision for a production asking such questions such as, do we do a comedy or is a musical good now?

So when it comes to setting the stage for getting to the heart of your anxiety, you must be willing to prepare.

Way 1: Separation

The goal is to separate ourselves in an atmosphere free from distractions; yes that means your precious smart phone, tablet or laptop. Silence is golden here. Take time for yourself to free yourself from the rush and crush of life for a bit.

Way 2: Reflection.

This is the step that may be the most heartfelt, or should be. This is you identifying the root core and being completely honest with who and where you are in this current moment. Putting all angst aside, you are indeed present in this moment. So in this Now Moment, the worry that brought you to this point has nothing to do with this moment, so drop it. You are here, be here completely Now. Do not allow the future that your ego is painting for you to exist. Make your own rules, which leads us to the third step.

Way 3: Connection or Connectivity.

Such as is preparation to start the theatrical production, these are the components that you have identified in your reflection stage that will move you away from angst; the concepts, people, places and things that you need to begin the process of looking towards the light that is your life. This is the process of the understanding that there is always a way forward.

In the end, it is a solitary journey that opens itself up to the resources the Universe provides for those who are willing to allow for a brighter future. Anxiety is not a way to live in this Present Moment and has no place here. Let’s begin the process together for while it is indeed a solitary journey, you are never alone.

Be a Person of Quality. Direct Your Power.

Until then…

Be Excellent, Expect the Best!

Let me Know your Thoughts Below, Follow this Blog, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

dasouthern@directyourpower.comDA Southern is an Author, Speaker, Blogger and a Personal Development Life Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for Coaching or Speaking @ dasouthern@directyourpower.com

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Spring Has Sprung – 3 Ways to Begin the Renewal Process of Abundance

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Spring is really a state of mind, is it not? I mean, yes, it is a date on the calendar but those kind of things have always made me reflect as to how locked into a certain mindset we have become.

It is as if we cannot enjoy a certain feeling of hopefulness and enthusiasm unless it is a certain time of the year or a special season. Like the Christmas season is a reason to be kinder to your fellow human.

Do you really need a reason? Do you need a reason to feel a sense of life surging through your veins in this Now Moment?

Life Begins When You Do

Yes, the Spring season brings about a renewal in the earth that does give us a sense of our own renewal, at least it should, but it doesn’t happen all at once, although it seems as if suddenly there is green everywhere and the smells of freshness invade your senses that the winter season seems to bury.

3 Ways to Begin the Renewal Process of Abundance

So, with the Spring season there comes an understanding that life is more than what you feel, is it not? It is an explosion of your senses as the freshness of life awakens within you. It is time to think differently and to think more with an eye towards expansion of self and of all that you are to the world.

Way 1: Have and Enjoy Life

What is it that we fail to have and enjoy life in this modern age with all of the so-called enlightenment that seems to be all around us. Never in our history have we been more aware of the way to calm our souls and become a more enlightened species.

Never.

But it seems as if with all of this knowledge, we have become more territorial, more prideful, more egocentric in the ways of living in a heightened state of consciousness and more self-absorbed in the ways of pleasure that seems to take us away from the advancement of the human condition.

To have and enjoy life means we are to become fully invested in the living at a higher level with an eye towards the lifting of others along the way.

To have and enjoy life means to shed yourself of shame, guilt, apathy, grief, fear, desire, anger, and pride and to rid yourself of limiting thought patterns that take you away from living fully in this Now Moment.

Way 2: Live Abundance in All Ways

Many are under the delusion that once you have a lot of money, you then have an abundant mindset. As i said, it is a delusion in that it first begins in your mind. Napoleon Hill said that whatever the mind of man can conceive, it can believe. Meaning that we are first within before it manifest without.

If we fail to have a wealth consciousness, then what ever perceived wealth we receive will quickly vanish as it was never part of who we were in the first place. It is the reason so many lottery winners are broke within a short period of time as they never believed themselves wealthy.

Money does not equate to wealth, but a wealthy mindset always equates to money.Get it? It is the same in all areas of your life. Think yourself abundant in all ways first within and the abundance will manifest in your surroundings in ways that most will call “luck”.

It is not. It is just the way you roll when it comes to abundant living.

Way 3: Allow Your Abundance to Overflow

This is the truth in all living…Let it overflow. Hold Nothing Back!

When you truly allow yourself to manifest with an abundant heart towards all things, you can’t help but to experience a truth of life. That when you begin to live abundantly in an overflowing nature, life explodes in ways you could never imagine.

Give it away and you will receive back in ways that will make your manifesting nature pale in comparison to what you may have been used to. When you live in such a way that manifesting from within becomes second nature, you will get a sense of the “overflowing” nature of abundance. It is the nectar to the soul that produces a garden of abundance that leave a sweetness to everything you touch.

Overflow and live the life you have imagined for when you do, the world will rise to meet you in the most uncommon of circumstances.

Be a Person of Quality. Direct Your Power.

Until then…

Be Excellent, Expect the Best!

Let me Know your Thoughts Below, Follow this Blog, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

dasouthern@directyourpower.comDA Southern is an Author, Speaker, Blogger and a Personal Development Life Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for Coaching or Speaking @ dasouthern@directyourpower.com

Being Mindful in Your Mission; 3 Ways to Dismiss Worry

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There is nothing that can invade the mindfulness of a true Present Moment thinker such as worry.

It is that egoic nature that can take the tranquility of the present Now Moment and give the ego complete and total charge of all that surrounds your Mission.

Worry, that ever-present reality, it seems, for most as they travel from Now Moment to Now Moment.

But why is that?

In a study i read recently, it was stated that a mere 8% of things people worried about actually manifested as reality. I would add that of that 8%, probably most things were so desired, worried about, that they were going to happen no matter what.

So what does that tell us?

It tells us that we are so desperate to desire some unforeseen future that we will manifest it even to the detriment of our very existence.

It tells us that the ego will go to extreme lengths to keep a hold on you, because worry is such as life itself. You forget about the actuality of that which might happen for the understanding that it might happen.

Essentially, most are in such a common place of worry that when one thing happens that they have indeed worried about, it becomes 100%. It happened just as you thought it would and now the ego can use it to bolster its claim on you as the defender of your safety.

One Bad Apple Spoils the Whole Bunch

In the world of theatre, it is as i have seen. An actor has an overall great performance and one person out of a hundred tells them that they didn’t like their performance.

One person! Guess what happens?

That’s correct my young Jedi, they obsess about the one comment, not taking into context at all why that one person didn’t like it, as if it matters. But i have seen a single bad comment take an actor and make them doubt themselves because they worry about another comment to the point that their performance suffers. So the very thing they worry about does indeed manifest.

Worry, really then, is all about the ego. The funny thing is that we have all done it, have we not? Because worry brings forth doubt in ourselves and our situation, we then define ourselves by the very worry we are in any moment we decide to commit ourselves to it. Even more bizarre is our capacity to see others commit themselves to worry and tell them not to.

But since the ego is really at the heart of worry, how can we make sense of it all? Worry is a natural part of life, is it not? I mean, our very existence is given images of worry in every facet of living by our news media alone.

The media feeds on worry and 90% of commercials are worry about some future event happening in your life if you don’t use their product. I have even seen a pill you can take in case you might have heartburn in the future. I am not kidding.

What is the number one cause of heart troubles in the USA alone? Stress. What is stress usually caused by? Worry about some future outcome.

I had a coaching client who recently came to a session in tears. Her daughter was in the midst of a divorce and she was “worried” about the grandchildren and the long-term affect on them.

As i probed deeper, as that must always be done with worry, it came out that it her daughter’s divorce was somehow a reflection on her. Her parenting, her life in general.

Her ego had so encased her in worry and how it was somehow an attack on her very core, that some perceived outcome with her grandchildren was keeping now keeping her in a state of worry about some unknown future.

You see how clever worry is used by the ego? Ultimately, most worry is somehow an attack on YOU and must be dealt with. Just the absurdity of it all makes most laugh but it is an ever-present danger within us all if we are not vigilant in keeping worry at bay.

Living in the Present Moment is freedom from worry but takes a conscious effort to rid yourself of the egoic nature that inhabits the very core of worry.

3 Ways to Begin the Process Dismissing Worry in Your Mission

 

Way 1: When Worry is Presented as an Option, Play it Out to its End.

What do i mean by that?

Be an actor and write the script. Take the object of worry and make a play out of it, which is what worry is, by the way.

The ego makes a whole play out that you actually believe. This time, however, you write it in your head with whatever far-fetched conclusion that could happen.

Make a game of it.

There is an old saying that you “illustrate absurdity by being absurd” and this is what is the intent. When you see the ridiculousness of all that must happen for the worry to become manifest, it really is quite amusing.

Way 2: Be Ever-Present Within this Now Moment

Decide that you are going to be ever-present in this Now Moment and that worry will not determine a future that does not exist. Just the very act of making a solid commitment will alert you when worry rears its ugly head.

Way 3: Acknowledge that the Ego Exists But Relegate it to the Mailroom of “You, Inc.”

Now, that might seem a bit strange, but if you treat the ego as it should be, as nothing more than someone from the mailroom, instead of the CEO of the company known as YOU, then you will go far in abating worry.

The ego will tell you all kinds of things to supposedly be in your best interest, but what the ego is trying to do is to be the one who makes all the decisions for you. The sad part is that most allow the ego to be in charge.

Take back the night, here. The ego HATES Now Moment living and by keeping you in a constant state of worry about the future gives it full control. Be better than that. Be ever-present in the Now.

Worry is the beast that will rear its ugly head in your life and you must be aware, but it is a beast that can be eradicated.

As far as worry goes, former Israel Prime Minister Benjamin Disraeli was quoted as saying, “Worry (the ego) – a God, invisible but omnipotent. It steals the bloom from the cheek and lightness from the pulse; it takes away the appetite, and turns the hair gray.”

Be better than the worry you allow into your life.

Be a Person of Quality. Direct Your Power.

Until then…

Be Excellent, Expect the Best!

Let me Know your Thoughts Below, Follow this Blog, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

dasouthern@directyourpower.comDA Southern is an Author, Speaker, Blogger and a Personal Development Life Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for Coaching or Speaking @ dasouthern@directyourpower.com

Are You Living Your Truth? 3 Ways To Know Your Truth

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Isn’t it funny how we drift through life sometimes seemingly thinking that we have it all under control? We go through our morning and daily routine thinking that we finally have a groove and, yet, there is an uneasiness about life that seems to permeate our very essence of life.

Joy seems to be something that happens in those fleeting moments when something external happens that we have planned to be as such. You could say that there is a heightened expectation of that joy, so, therefore, we must obtain it.

The Question Then Begs; Are You Living Your Truth?

Are the moments you are experiencing coming from a place of joy or are you manufacturing moments that seem to fill the emptiness but for a fleeting moment.

It is at the heart of all indulgences that there is a fundamental expectation of joy to be experienced, but the real expression is of a life that seeks to live in truth.

Joy and a joyful state, then, are simply the extension of your truth, whatever it is.

Let us be clear here; truth is not about what you do as much as who you are in what you do. You are the George Bailey of your “It’s A Wonderful Life” and it is for you to know that the world would have been a different place without you. But what is it about you that is your truth?

You are not just some physical being that is taking up space, are you? What is it that is the essence of who you are that allow for your truth to shine?

3 Ways to Know Your Truth

In “It’s A Wonderful Life”, George Bailey was not just a guy running a savings and loan, but a soul who inspired others to be better for themselves by his very care and concern for who they were. Of course, it goes much deeper than that and is why the movie is watched every Christmas Season as it inspires a truth of character that we all would like to identify with, no matter how hard-hearted the world has made you to this point.

Way 1: Understand Your Passions

The best way to understand your truth is to look at what inspires you; what are you passionate about? Whatever that is, there is a core truth there within the passion that shines a certain light on your truth. Look not at the passion or the inspiration, but what about it is as such to you? There within are fundamentals of your truth.

Way 2: What Would You Do If You Knew You Could Not Fail?

In the seeds of this question are the seeds of your truth in that when there are no restrictions that you put on yourself, there is a core truth that shines out like a beacon. You could call it your beacon of truth. Here in the depths of no limitations, most self-imposed, the core you emerges to become a truth, almost as if it could not be stopped from doing so.

Here is where most fall down in this question. They begin the process of asking, but then allow the ego to tell them to “be realistic” or to ‘live in reality’ as you have neither the time, money, or resources to be or do what you desire. So, why even bother playing this ridiculous game.

Sound familiar?

The secret here is to know that you are looking for your truth and from there you shall build it into a life of possibilities.

Way 3: Update Your Data Base

Like an anti-virus program that runs continually on your system that seeks to eliminate constant threats to your computer, you should update your personal anti-virus data base that runs to eliminate your negative past and the thinking that is keeping you from your truth.

You see, the past is used by so many as a reason to not allow the truth of who they are to be ever-present. For some reason, your truth was put down as something not valuable or realistic or whatever else the ego has used to keep you for being the expansive creature that we are all designed to be.

Something about your truth may have been used against you or made fun of, so you have buried it.

Update your anti-virus data base and eliminate the past negative emotions and actions, unless you need to hang on being a victim in some way. Let the data base update to clear you of those things from the past that seek to define your present.

You are not your past, but are only here as a testament to it. And your past is in no way your future. This is the moment. Update your Data Base and clear out the limitations that have kept you from your truth, for in the end, we are but given a truth that is our life journey.

Live it and allow the joy that it is to wash over you and cleanse you from the limitations that have kept you from your truth.

Be a Person of Quality. Direct Your Power.

Until then…

Be Excellent, Expect the Best!

Let me Know your Thoughts Below, Follow this Blog, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

dasouthern@directyourpower.comDA Southern is an Author, Speaker, Blogger and a Personal Development Life Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for Coaching or Speaking @ dasouthern@directyourpower.com

Being In The Flow of Life: 3 Ways to Embrace the Beginning of Flow Within

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Do you find yourself often going through the routines of life with no concern for the actual essence of all that surrounds you?

Does anything that happens ‘out of the ordinary’ throw you for a loop and gives you an excuse to have a bad day?

Does your flow seem more like a muddy pool of water that has a filmy substance covering it with a gentle aroma that seems slightly unpleasant to the senses?

Flow. Everyone talks of it. Most embrace it as a way, or as a desire, as a way to live their lives. The truth, however, is crouched in a security mindset that leaves nothing for flow at all in your life.

Life, then, becomes nothing more than for an accumulation for the shinny things that somehow, then, constitute a way to make life exciting. Be it the latest electronic gadget or the immersion into the latest sports team that we seem to desire to live vicariously through or some television program that diverts us from any sense of flow.

Now, i am not being a ‘you kids, get off of my lawn’ here, i assure you. I love great movies and tv that entertains. However, sometimes, when you fill you mind with all of the trivialities of life and wonder why a sense of flow is interrupted, you have to begin to take notice.

Flow Begins With the Questions We Ask

The question then becomes one not so much of the external, but one of the internal and the place the soul’s growth is within your life. Do you take care of the internal in places that only silence and reflection can truly take you? Do you release yourself to a higher level of living in that you are mindful of the Universal Way of life for all of creation? Do you truly release yourself and your ego long enough in any given period of time to truly care about life or are you so invested in your own trials and tribulations that life becomes a one-dimensional look from only your perspective.

Essentially, i am asking you if you see beyond yourself and actually enjoy what you see?

3 Ways to Embrace the Beginning of Flow Within

It is funny how most expect struggle and desperately seek a release of that struggle in terms of just being in the flow. It seems as if they so enjoy the essence of the struggle that flow then becomes a place or a condition of circumstances of things and people. Yes, these things may be part of the enjoyment of flow, but they are not flow that comes from within.

Way 1: Be Willing to Understand that Flow is Always an Inside Job

A penny on the track will derail a train. Well, that is what i thought when i was a kid. I was once walking along side of some railroad tracks with some friends when i was a kid and found a series of about ten mishapped pennys along a certain stretch of track. As i picked them up, one of my friends excitedly asked if some one was trying to derail a train. I looked at him as he told the story of derailing a train by putting a penny on the track and how he had heard about it from a cousin.

I still laugh at the story and how excited that made my friend at the time. That a tiny little copper piece could actually derail a huge, heavy train. But, in retrospect, is it any different than what happens to us on a daily basis? A small little change in our daily routine can cause us to ‘go off the rails’ in such a way that everyone around us suffers in the process,

Flow, then, begins with that place within that understands that you are the train and no penny can derail you.

Way 2: Understand that Circumstances Don’t Define You

In the great poem by Rudyard Kipling, “If”, he talks about the virtue of keeping your head when he penned, “If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you” and goes on to illustrate that circumstances should never rule the day.

In the final verse, he talks of being the same to all when he wrote, “If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch, If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you…Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it.”

There is no circumstance that should define you. There is an old saying that says ‘that it is not so much what happens to you, but how you react to it that counts’, is so very true. It is always about your reactions and the way you are in peace with the moments.

Way 3: Be Willing to Release Judgement of Situations and People

One of the greatest killers of flow in one’s life is the judgement in all situations and the people you deal with. Judgement is life the eternal water on the flame of life that seeks to snuff out flow in allowing life to manifest within you all that your heart desires. When you judge situations and people and make assumptions based on those judgements, you are damming up any chance for flow to become your existence.

When you simply release any preconceived notions of people, groups and situations in general, you allow flow to become your very existence, you begin the process of truly living in the flow.

The old expression, ‘Before criticizing a man, walk a mile in his shoes.” applies here and, while the ego may persuade you to live in these judgements, or life experiences as it may be called, instead, allow new experiences to become your norm.

Allow the flow of life to envelop you and give you a new perspective, a new appreciation for the excellence of the journey of life for, therein, lies the heart of flow and of living in truth.

Be a Person of Quality. Direct Your Power.

Until then…

Be Excellent, Expect the Best!

Let me Know your Thoughts Below, Follow this Blog, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

dasouthern@directyourpower.comDA Southern is an Author, Speaker, Blogger and a Personal Development Life Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for Coaching or Speaking @ dasouthern@directyourpower.com

The Suckiness of Fear: 3 Ways to Abate Fear Within You

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OK, i get it…Suckiness is not really a word, but it should be, right?

There is really nothing else i can say that coveys my disdain for the very aspect of fear within our lives. We are taught it. It is held up as a teacher, as a guide to give us the right way to live.

Blah, blah, blah…

We fear everything, it seems, and most of the time the ego has so got a hold on us that we cannot truly live our lives in the joy that is intended as the cool creatures that we are.

Why is that?

There is a whole industry in the self-improvement arena that focuses on ‘facing your fears’. I’m all for that, but the depth of that is far deeper in that there is a truth to be told that instigates the fear itself.

Why does it exist and why have you allowed it to so control you very existence.

I have heard people tell me that they fear death. How do they know? What is it about death that seems to cause people to change the way they live their lives?

It is like when your parents told you to watch out for traffic when you were little because a car could kill you. Well, true, and it is healthy to teach awareness, but, at some point, as far as i know, we all don’t get out alive. It is not that i am telling you to step out into traffic, but to fear something that may or may not happen to the point that it governs your life is truly absurd.

The larger point here is that fear is usually a very unhealthy aspect of the egoic-mind trying to protect its puny existence.

A recent study that was done over a twenty-year time period stated that of the fears that people allowed themselves to imagine, (things that might happen in the future) that of the 100% that were imagined, a mere 8% actually happened. And of the 8%, anywhere from 3% to 5% were so self-imagined that it seemed that events were actually manifested by the participants to make sure the fears actually happened.

To put it another way; 95% of the things that we fear to happen, never have a chance of happening, and that is being pretty generous with our stats.

3 Ways to Abate Fear Within You

If you have decided that you are going to live in the 5% of life that might happen, then that is your life journey. However, if you are thinking that life can be a bit more incredible if you were to break away from fear within your life journey, then it is time to let go and live with a new awareness of life, of love and of the very understanding that you were created to be more than what your ego has decided for you.

Way 1: Understand the Nature of Fear

In any fear-based situation, there is a nature of fear that is fear itself. Many times it is experience in your life that you have processed in a strange way that has no truth on the situation itself. Many times it is authority figures that have dictated their fears to you, so you live vicariously through them in your fear. For whatever the reason the fear exist, it is not so much as to pretend it doesn’t exist, but ask yourself the nature of its existence within you.

An example would be that many people fear flying, but the truth is that more people are killed while driving in a year than flying. Most people i have met who have been in an accident in a car, make it their mission to get back in again to essentially ‘get over it’.

Fear can be debilitating, in that there is no doubt, but really at the heart of many fears is the lack of egoic control. Fear is usually fear of the unknown, is it not?

Way 2: Ask the “What If – Then What?” Questions of the Fear

This is a fairly simple way to deal with the absurdity of fear in many instances.

Ask ‘What If, Then What?’’

What if the fear were to indeed manifest in the moment you imagined it? What then would happen and try to diffuse the fear by carrying it out as far as your mind will allow. the key here is to be absurd as possible as many times, that is the very nature of the fear to begin with.

There was a movie that starred Nicolas Cage called, “Next” that i enjoyed as this was essentially the premise of the movie. In the movie, Cage was a Las Vegas magician who can see into the future in two minute time sequences. What i thought was intriguing was the way he could take a fear of doing a certain action and see what it’s consequences would have been.

Do the same with your fear, but really use the outcome of your fear as would have already have happened to try to project a scenario of it happening.

Way 3: Ask the Final Questions, “What’s the Worse that Can Happen” and then, “What Then?”

At the end of the scenario for the 2nd Way, ask the question “What is the Worse that can happen?” I mean really get to the heart of the fear. More than likely the most carried out aspect of all fears, from the ego’s standpoint, is in some way death. Somehow the fear will eventually lead you to death.

Oh brother, your ego is telling you that if this happens or that happens, you maybe, just might, more than likely, will die, at some point, maybe, but not quite sure.

Do you see the absurdity of it all?

Again, i do not belittle some fears that may be ingrained and rooted in a real circumstance, but, i assure you, that most can be dealt with and, in most cases, can make you a stronger you when dealt with.

Fear is the Death Star within your soul that keeps you in line.

One of the quotes from Star Wars was when Darth Vader was talking about the Death Star and the abolishing of the Imperial Senate.

A character played by a pretty famous actor, Peter Cushing who played Grand Moff Tarkin, was quoted as saying, “The regional governors now have direct control over their territories. Fear will keep the local systems in line. Fear of this Battle Station.”

Is your Death Star within keeping you from truly living your life? Ask the questions and don’t allow the fear in life to take you from a life of expansion and of beauty in the most uncommon of ways.

It is your journey, live it well.

Be a Person of Quality. Direct Your Power.

Until then…

Be Excellent, Expect the Best!

Let me Know your Thoughts Below, Follow this Blog, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

dasouthern@directyourpower.comDA Southern is an Author, Speaker, Blogger and a Personal Development Life Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for Coaching or Speaking @ dasouthern@directyourpower.com

The Art of Motivation: 3 Ways To Treat It As A Reality Show

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Motivation comes in all shapes and sizes and, quite frankly, you can never really tell what it is that motivates someone, as it is not a one-size-fits-all frame of mind.

Everyone has a different place where motivation seems to hit them and to try to fit the very word of Motivation into a preconceived idea that fits the masses, is a crazy concept.

But we seem to do it.

The way most parents seem to motivate their kids, the way managers motivate their staff and the way advertisers use different tactics on us to motivate consumers to buy.

In any political season, especially, you see what seems to be a mass motivation for candidates that propel is to care about issues that other times we don’t concern ourselves with as we are on the daily mission to simply live in the Universal Way of abundance.

Motivation: Running To or Running Away

At its core, Motivation is the designation of one of two possible concepts; the running away from something or the running to something. And more often than not, they are aimed directly at our insecurities about ourselves or our situation. Basically, our ego.

Now, don’ get me wrong here. Motivation at its core has a place but should come from a far deeper place than the egoic tendency of appealing to some insecurity. Motivation is really a larger look at who we are in the Universal Way.

I love reality shows. I do. I watch most of the main ones from Survivor to Amazing Race to Top Chef and Hells Kitchen, Celebrity Apprentice to even, Big Brother. Reality shows are a study of the human ego on trial and believe it or not, Motivation is the glue that holds it all together. Motivation is also on display as the way people run from a situation or run to a situation or other people.

What i love about the shows is that they offer a compressed look at what is usually played out in life, but it is in a heightened atmosphere of loss and reward.

Life is the same way, it just plays out at a more casual level unless we are ‘forced’ out of our comfort zone and have to act, or should i say, react.

Ways Reality Shows Can Show Us Motivation

While some may roll their eyes at reality shows, like it or not, they give is a peak into our own psychology of the way we might me motivated.

Believe it or not, there is a lot of psychology that has gone into the way the game is structured; to the way the people are separated into groups to the challenges that are devised along the way for ‘rewards’.

With that there are lessons, or takeaways, that we can apply to our own reality show called our lives.

Way 1: Look at the Way You are Motivated to Play the Game.

It is funny to watch the reality players enter with a certain ‘strategy’ and then as soon as they get there, all of a sudden there is some twist or some quirky personality they had not intended on and their strategy goes out the window.

The challenge with strategies is that they are often like playing sand volleyball. The shifting sand always presents a challenge as to how you will react and it is only after years of playing that someone seems to master the concepts.

The way you play the game is a reflection of who you are. If you go in with a set core strength as to who you are, there is no need for strategies. You operate from your center and you are free to adapt to changing circumstances as they arise. You then take the reaction and change it to positive action.

Way 2: What is the Motivation of Who You Make Alliances With?

It always intrigues me when these reality players within the first microsecond of starting the game, decide to forge an alliance not even knowing who is playing along side of them. They like the way they look, or talk or whatever, and decide to cast their lot with them. What is always amazing is when it comes to the end of the game and the people who were sent packing from the game decide to cop an attitude form someone who went against the alliance.

Really? it is a game and there can be only one left standing. The ego always lashes out when it thinks it is being attacked. But what is really happening is that the ego needs to be always first and when someone stands in its way, then it becomes insulted.

Life is like that as well. We make shaky alliances that go against our core and then we are ‘thrown under the bus’ because of those alliances, we blame the alliance, the people, the way the game is played…everything but the person in the mirror.

By the way, I am of the mindset that when they interview folks for the reality shows, a question they ask them is that, when they were a kid, were they told to be good sports if playing a game? If the answer is “No” they get to be on the show.

Don’t fall victim to being a victim of alliances you have made. Be strong to who your core self is.

Way 3: What is the Motivation for You to Change Your Way of Playing?

There comes a point where we have to adapt, to change, to evolve to a higher level of life, of living. It is really our driving desire to become more than we think we are.

To truly think outside of yourself. It is only the acceptance of the lack attitude that keeps you where you are. The attitude that doesn’t give you the Motivation to move forward as you have seemed to have lost your zeal for doing so.

In reality shows, there are usually alliances, teams that ‘stick together’ through thick or thin, or until its time to win.

The last season of Survivor had a beautiful portrayal of that very point. The one team had gotten the upper hand on the other by a one person shift to their side and managed to pick off the opposing team one-by-one until they were left by themselves to fight it out to the end.

At that point, someone had to decide to change their strategy and make bold moves to Outwit and Outplay the rest. The “this-team-loves-each-other-no-matter-what-happens’ became the most cut-throat bunch that ever played the game. Someone had to be motivated beyond the team and reach within themselves to get to the end.

In life, the motivation really is to keep our truth and be able to adapt to the shifting sands of time. Examine what it is that motivates you to change your strategy, but always be sure it is not something that goes against your core values.

In the end, it is always the ones with the quiet resolve that tend to garner the respect of the other players. It is you inner core values of who you are, without the ego, that defines your truth.

Live it with the fullness that you are for you are truly worth it.

Be Excellent, Expect the Best!

Let me Know your Thoughts Below, Follow this Blog, and be Social with this Post, for the more people we have living successfully in this Now Moment and discussing the value of doing so, the higher we lift all others around us.

*******

directyourownlife@gmail.comDA Southern is an Author, Speaker, Blogger and a Personal Development Life Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for Coaching or Speaking directyourownlife@gmail.com

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