There is an old saying that says that when you actually break the word, ASSUME, into its designated parts, you slash between the second “S” and after the “U” to say that when you assume, you make and ASS out of U and ME.
This is the very nature of assuming and assumptions. It is the way the ego keeps you forever guessing about the nature of life and people in general as well as constantly second-guessing yourself based on these illogical and irrational assumptions.
Assumptions are often cleverly disguised as hope and dreams but are, more often than not, just the egos way of keeping you in check. Another way assumptions are disguised in hope is in the form of worry and all its incarnations.
You see, your ego is like an onion with layers and layers of skin and the closer you get to the actual core of the ego, the more it makes you cry as you come to understand its hold on you. So most don’t take the trip to the core to rid themselves of its affect on their lives.
But it is a journey that must be forged for the dangers of not doing so are a life of constant second-guessing of your life. It means living so out of phase with the very nature that we are, love, that it becomes a convoluted mess that seemingly makes no sense.
Like the layers of an onion, we will slowly uncover that which has bound you. As we do so with the very nature of assumptions, please don’t assume anything here. It is all intertwined and as the layers begin to expose the ego, you will begin to understand the way the ego has turned you against yourself all in the name of “protecting” you.
From what, we are not quite sure of, but it is a journey to take for clarity and for love.
Assumptions are a benevolent dictator, of sorts, that the ego uses to guide you. It is actually the very nature of what many magicians use to guide you along a path of being truly amazed. We assume so much and the ego knows that, but the more we are lost within them, the more natural they feel to us.
3 Ways to Neutralize the Ego and Assumptions
The Way #1: Understand the Nature of Truth
Understand that at the heart of all assumptions are truths that you hold dear that are not truths at all. When Columbus took out to find whatever he was looking for, you know that many at that time assumed that earth was flat and that Columbus and the gang would fall off into space. Of course we laugh, but we would probably have believed it if we lived back then.
Assumptions are usually based on many shifting ideas while truth just is. This is why scientist do what they do; discover the truth. But scientist are not Gods, in that as soon as they spout some theory, and yes, many things are theories, they are taken as truths. Unfortunately we assume they are and give their words truth.
Gravity is truth, but we have learned to defy gravity, have we not?
All i am saying is that your truth is your truth and be clear about the nature of that truth for you. Just be very careful that the ego doesn’t subvert that truth for its own devices.
The Way #2: The Ass out of U and Me Approach
When faced with an apparent assumption, back off and cut it up. If you become a scientist testing out all of the hypothesis, will the assumption pass your truth test? Is the ego at all involved in any part of the assumption? (Uhh… the answer here is usually, “Yes”)
Here is an example from a client. A lady was talking of her daughters divorce and she was concerned with someone who she was interested in dating.
She made an assumption based on the father of the family, that all boys would be exactly like the father who had a reputation for being somewhat of a “ladies man”, or so she said. So she assumed that all of the boys would be exactly as their father who had been married several times, therefor they would be unfaithful as well. I asked her if she had met the one boy her daughter was interested in. She replied, “No, but i am sure he like his daddy.”
I see it often as a coach in life and in business; people make assumptions that have no bearing in truth at all but then hold those assumptions as truth, often to the detriment of future Now Moments decisions.
The ego is a sly one and will use every trick to keep you from living life from the heart and keeping you from your truth.
This is an exercise that many don’t seem to want to do, but think they know what they are. The challenge here is asking yourself if you have allowed your ego and others, through assumptions and upbringing, to decide for you these values.
Often, when i have a coaching client that is entrepreneurial, i see several patters that emerge; a ‘breakaway’ from a preconceived track that others thought for him/her. An understanding that they are to serve the greater good by becoming a creator and an inherent view of something larger than themselves.
At the heart of it, however, was a grounding in the values that are their truth. The beautiful thing about values is that they are your truth and yours alone. it is only when the ego or the assumption that others no better for you, that they become a muddled mess.
Identify your core values and be truthful here. Don’t allow the ego or any preconceived assumptions about life skew your list. you can do it in private. Identify the top 10 to 15 for yourself and maybe the top 25 to 50 overall.
Here is a great list for you to look over to get you started.
Then go about living by Directing Your Own Life to that end. It is only your life to live and yours alone, never allow the ego and assumptions to set the stage for you.
Be Excellent, Expect the Best.
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DA Southern is an Author, Speaker, Blogger and a Strategic Life Coach, teaching the spirit of living in Now Moments with the principles he experienced during over 35 years as an actor and director in live theatre. DA coaches his clients to rid life of limiting beliefs that have kept them from achieving miracles in all areas of their life by embracing Mindfulness of the Present Moment with a renewed Vision for life. Contact DA Southern for Coaching or Speaking @ firstname.lastname@example.org